When I wrote Break & Untangle, I didn’t start with a master plan.
I just wrote what needed to be written — then went back to organize it.

What I discovered surprised me:
Every method I wrote about naturally fell into three major categories.

Three mindsets that shape everything:
Self, Strategy, and Social.

And any breakthrough you want — personal, professional, or relational — starts with working inside one of these three.

1. Self Mindset: The “I/Me” Work

This is your internal world — your beliefs, patterns, baggage.

When you’re stuck here, the breakthrough lies in changing your thoughts.
Different thinking leads to different outcomes.

It’s the hardest work you’ll do — and the most liberating.

2. Strategy Mindset: The “It” Work

This is the tactical side — time, money, systems, habits.

When strategy is the issue, the breakthrough happens through action.

You don’t need a new mindset here.
You need new moves.

3. Social Mindset: The “Us/We” Work

This is how you relate to others — communication, connection, collaboration.

Remember:
When two people come together, they create a third thing — the relationship itself.

Healthy relationships are intentionally built.
Breakthroughs happen in the between.

Bonus: Two Other Mindsets You Should Know

Later, I realized there are two more forces always influencing the core three:

• Societal Mindset — how society shapes us (and how we shape it back)

• Spiritual Mindset — how our beliefs about life and meaning influence everything else

They’re powerful forces you should be aware of in your own growth journey.

Why This Framework Matters

When you know which mindset needs work, you stop feeling stuck.

You get clarity.

You get a plan.

• If it’s Self, work your thinking.

• If it’s Strategy, change your actions.

• If it’s Social, build stronger connections.

This framework breaks big problems into solvable parts — and real transformation becomes possible.

Want to Go Deeper?

If this resonates with you, check out Ken Wilber’s A Brief History of Everything.

(Full disclosure: I found Wilber after writing Break & Untangle — and was amazed how aligned we were.)

He offers an even deeper look at how we can map and evolve our human experience.

Or start with my book, Break & Untangle for a more practical approach to this mindset work. 

You don’t have to stay stuck.
You just have to know where to start.

Self. Strategy. Social.

Master these, and your next breakthrough is inevitable.